I thought I had the clarity, until I had to explain it.
I sat down to submit it as there was no more time to postpone.
But the ideas that I assumed would come easily … didn’t.
It was an application for a one week residential program from the online course I was taking. It was focused on developing ideas for social impact.
Yet, I was still sitting, trying to articulate my submission.
I kept trying to narrow it down but I felt like leaving something important out. The more I tried to focus it, the more incomplete it felt. There were too many directions. What do I keep, what do I leave out, what do I try to combine? There were also aspects that were more interesting to me than what was practical to implement.
I was going in circles, trying to figure out a clear direction.
I had been thinking about it for days but it was still puzzling to me that I couldn’t formulate it in a more focused way. And somehow, I had still waited until the day of the deadline. As if it would come together by itself at the last minute.
The questions weren’t many but they required clarity.
And yet, the ideas felt familiar because I had been consuming so much content around them.
Podcasts. Courses. Articles. Books. Videos.
Compared to what I knew a year ago, now I know more. And most of all, I know where to go to know more. I felt inspired. It also felt like progress, like I was getting closer – without knowing exactly to what.
Maybe that’s why it felt like clarity.
I submitted the application anyway. It was broad. Generic. An early version of Memmar, framed as a hub for learning resources.
My application was not accepted. Of course.
And it didn’t feel good.
But something changed. I couldn’t ignore the gap anymore, between what I thought I knew and what I could actually define.
How I engaged with the ideas and questions stayed with me over the years – more than anything I had consumed.
It wasn’t the rejection that stayed with me but what it revealed. I started to approach this idea differently. Less consumption and more intention in how I refined it.
Where are you consuming a lot, but haven’t yet defined what it means for you?
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If you’ve been thinking about your next step but haven’t been able to clearly articulate it yet, this might be a useful place to start: Getting Oriented: A First Step.